
Horses, Kids & Positive Reinforcement: A Look at Learning Together
Over Easter I had the absolute joy of spending time with my 4-year-old niece around the horses. Watching her eyes light up when she met Elly, Thunder, Ninja and the others made me stop and think… How can we teach kids about horses in a way that’s kind, safe, and fun for everyone involved, human and horse alike?
It also made me reflect on how I was taught.
When I was a kid (back in the days of the dinosaurs), the vibe was very much “the horse does what he is told.” If he didn’t, you made him. Enter lots of pressure, pushing, pulling, kicking, and not a lot of listening. To the horse or to me, for that matter!
I wish I’d learned differently. I wish someone had shown me that horses are sentient, that they communicate with us all the time, if only we take the time to listen.
When kids come into the horse world, the first thing most grown-ups worry about is safety. And fair enough, horses are big, powerful animals. But when we get anxious, it can lead to harsh handling, harsher equipment, and pushing kids (and horses) in ways that don’t feel good to anyone.
Here’s the good news: It doesn’t have to be that way.
Yes, safety matters. Absolutely. So let’s start there:
- Get a properly fitted helmet and a sturdy pair of boots. This is non-negotiable and should be part of the ritual. Not a boring rule, but something that makes the child feel confident and prepared.
- Supervise and guide but do it in a way that builds trust and understanding, not fear.
Real safety isn’t about control, it’s about clarity. Clear expectations, good communication, and teaching kids to observe and understand horses, not just ride them.
One of the best things we can teach kids is that horses aren’t toys or machines — they’re living, feeling beings with their own thoughts, preferences, and needs.
So let’s flip the script. Instead of asking, “What can this horse do for me today?” let’s ask:
- What can I learn about this horse today?
- How can I make this a good experience for both of us?
- What does my horse need right now; physically, emotionally, and socially?
Start with simple things. Show them how to read body language — ears, eyes, tails, posture. Teach them that horses, just like people, can feel relaxed, anxious, curious, or unsure.Teach them that we can respond when it’s required, by showing the horse we are listening, and that we can see, adjust, and respond with empathy.
Just like with our horse learners, we need to meet our human learners where they’re at. If a child is nervous or unsure, which is totally normal when the “classroom” is a 500kg animal, respect that. Let them set the pace.
- Keep sessions short
- Make them fun and engaging
- Encourage questions (even the “silly” ones!)
- Celebrate tiny wins — they’re not tiny to your learner
- Allow space for reflection — “How did that feel? What do you think the horse was saying?”
And remember being brave doesn’t mean pushing through fear. It means feeling safe enough to explore new things, knowing you can stop or step back anytime.
The ultimate goal? A real partnership. One based on trust, open communication, and mutual understanding.
When we teach kids this way, with compassion, curiosity, and kindness, we’re not just shaping great horse people. We’re raising empathetic, observant, respectful humans. And let’s be honest, the world could always use more of those.
So here’s to slowing down, tuning in, and helping the next generation learn that the best way to be with horses, is be *with* horses. Side by side.
Because today’s kids are tomorrow’s handlers, trainers, and teachers. The way we introduce them to horses now shapes the kind of horse world they’ll help create later. So let’s start them off on the right foot — with empathy, understanding, and a deep respect for the animals they’re learning to love.
Let’s raise a new generation of thoughtful, force-free horse lovers.
Written by Emma Lanera and the PPGA Equine Sub-Committee
***For safety reasons PPGA strongly recommends kids wear approved horse riding helmets for all equine activities, not just riding.